Plain, plain feeling ahead

。。。。。。。。。have loads to talk about but doesn't know where to start :/
ignorance frm parents.......that's how I start and end 。。。

Ps : nothing abt my crush today

100% agreement to this

Okayyyy...this actually made my day coz it gave me so much courage in one paragraph !!! XD #thankstowhoeverwrotethat

Exhausted Zzzzz

目标：

-目前的目标是把全部所定下来的目标达成。
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再说什么啊。。。
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                          1。就要拿优越的成绩报 
。 。 。 。 。        答父母，报答自己咯
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2。2014年，若有机会一定要找个机会突破自己。（这是哪儿的话啊==˙˙˙˙˙˙＊）
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                                               3。男朋友嘛 ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓ ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓ ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓                                                。。。。。看情况咯 \【⊙|⊙】/★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★★★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆

PS :太无聊了，来个华语版xD 原谅我呗  。。。。。。  〖●＿●〗。。。谁叫妈妈不让电话放在房里啊 TT #悲哀 #沮丧

注明****我绝对没在偷懒哦！！老师给的数学题超多的!!我离房（好像离家酱xD)跟电话混了一下下。。。。*告诉妈妈在写作文:-P

So how bout I write a proposal letter? :/ #goshimsogutless

Okayyyyy .... : you don't wanna leave regrets behind they say...
  me: but...but... We dk each otherr TT how am I spose to go like be friends with him suddenly and make sure that he likes me (a little mayb? ) back??? My first attempt .... Failing is also a way to the success they say "失败乃成功之母”。。。 BUT I DONT WANNA FAILLLLL TT

Okay ...I just have to be more straight forward to myself

Monday(30/6/2014)
Said was going to give up.... But when Mr crush appeared ..actually walked pass me  twice this morning already :/ ( was chatting with my friend,>>recess time) I..I ...can't .....can't..ttaaallkk...ttalk...properlyyyy !!! It's like me  from normal to zero!!
   wow I couldn't believe myself like srsly..
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The moment when the school's  future commander for girl scouts went cuckoo when her crush appears ...
Conclusion: want her to fail,, bring'im hereee !!!

** plus I really dislike that feeling oh gosh ><

So proud of miss sherilyn pak ( BESTEST FRIEND)

She's the one in pink holding a guitar like a boss xD she finally finished her performance and she looks gorgeous ehh? XD ~~~

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Sorry sherilyn..if u see this xD not on Purpose xD

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Ur crush beside xDXD
#AWESOMEHIGHSCHOOLLIFE

寻肉记xD

=) (GOOD LUCK)

Tho it was a little bit unpleasant before our date , but everything went well better than expected ;D

So, there was the five of us tuition friends xD  I srsly hate-love them...

 We're always complaining about one and another..(ps:uhhh, im the neutral in the group xD)but no one can separate us coz we're the inseparable :-P

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Still, maybe this outing is when I finally realize that I can live life like I used to with my buddies instead of having a boyfriend to actually have a complete life.

It's not that I don't have a life to fulfill or what ..but at least that was how immature for me to think like that..

For now  I think I shouldn't get into a relationship as everyone's working hard for their future..

16years old, (sweet sixteen?) I don't need a boyfriend to have a sweet one xD ( still trying to forget about my crush :/)

He's 17 ... Peak year for us to fight for our future .. Should have a "DO NOT DISTURB I NEED CONCENTRATION" sign for us to hang to? XD hahah 

Blogger ....(cyber space for me to express)

Here, whether he'll see this or not 

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 To: Mr crush

 good luck in everything , 

Find someone way better than your EX!

(obviously..)

Ok , lets admit....im JELLY OKAYYx(

Never let anything or anyone ruin you ...

Last but not least 

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Hope u know that theres a girl who once went crazyyy for you during school dayss..

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you'll probably be in my history list

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Would I be in yours to?

From: the one who fell for you on her sixteenth 

The going up? or going down ? Love storrryyyy

    Had been concerning myself to not let a boy to distract me and my emotions...well it didn't went well. I got jealous (maybe ?! Idk,just strange on the inside :/ ) when girls happened to interact or whatever with him LOL

     Then I told my friends im giving up..too tired for that...but then in minutes time.(ps: t'was after recess at school ,standing beside my classroom's door chatting v friends)..BOY A (again=3=) he countdown 3,2,1 while standing at the door , and everyone was looking, automatically I looked tooo!...but when I realized it's no other than "special thing happening" it was too late TvT my crush passed by and look in to my classroom coz BOY A counted so loudly and he was pointing to my direction.....my buddies were JUST right beside me and yesssss we're all paralyzed for minutes ....and they say that im no difference with a TOMATO !!(blushed..)
 
     I knew I was doomed coz im having tuition at night , and he's gonna be there too...for now I think he knows i like him ..and there's no more chance for me to be Normal friends with him TT....I'd totally
Screwed my image infront of him EVERYTIME ...And plus ,, rumours spread fast .... I think his ex knew too TT...she'd been talking bout me the pass few weeks..and I bet on her facebook status..she's referring to me YEAAAA screw life I fell for someone who had an ex that doesn't want to give up on him..it's like a war and im totally losing .. (although my friends said I can get him easier then how his ex got him,,but nahhh I don't think soo :/ )
   
      tuition night >>> I passed by him staring at the floor like a prisoner...and I think he's looking....but then scalded off like a scalded cat when I reach the main door and ran downstairs..with a red red red red red red red faceee ... #onceagainIfail

The first time I got so overwhelmed by a guy I don't even know

     I'll sum all out in one shot,, coz I couldn't take it anymore .
   
      So,before anything actually happened..I live an ordinary ,happy go lucky life. It all happens when someone told me about my ex classmate..who's a little hate-able..not really,but at least she's not really welcomed among our classmates,coz she's strange , as in puberty problems or what I don't know..but all I know was that no one messes with her coz if u got her mad or she dislikes u , all u can hear from her mouth is utterly-bad words..which somehow hurts .
     
     First of all , im not trying to be mean here ..but it's not just me..it's almost everyone I know who thinks so? I heard she had a relationship with a boy who's one year older than us, and his "terms and conditions" are way too good for her..But!! that's just what I heard , I didnt know who the boy was ..
 
      So , I activated my stalking mode ,, or nice to say  , I started INVESTIGATING..
But my investigation didnt go well  , all I can do is stand afar and watch them together ..or u can say stalking her boyfriend from afar.. Making guess of how the girl attracted him..
 
      And I didn't have the slightest clue of what have got them together..of course I wasnt that boring to stalk people like that.But that was the topic of the month I think? Boys n girls talking about them is what that bothered me most.

       Doesnt want to get out of that topic as she was my ex classmate too!
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And finally shit happened TT(but that was the second year already , that means I started stalking them since 2013's last few months)
 **I swear I never wished to be a spy!!
   
      And that shit was that I fell for a boy who's a year older than me who had an ex .Yes, my classmate's ex boyfriend...
     
       Pretty weird for a person like me to fall for someone I don't know ,, coz falling in love during school days was never in my list! Despite being the one who always roll her eyes when passing by couples..was now fully in love with someone's ex!  And mind u, its not love at first sight ,I've been stalking like forever okayyy!!
   
       Then , right after I knew that I had a crush on him..I found out that he attended the same tuition centre as I'm in right nowww!! As I wish  , I finally get to look at  him closer..but was never that thrilled coz on the day I notice we're in the same tuition,he wore a T-shirt which was similar to mine at home !  (in pink,for a running event ) .
 
       I didn't get really hyper immediately but then on the next day, where all students gather in a classroom for essay tuition, I didnt expected him to be in the same class with me , so I purposely chose the shirt he wore yesterday to cherish myself , like crazy..And then everything got crazier when he sat beside me...and I was wearing that very same pink shirt! I didn't know whether he noticed ,, but praise the lord I was hyper than ever!
 
       On the very same day,I message my bestfriend about the incident and she finally let me acknowledged that I ,myself , am in love..( I blushed very very very incredibly hard the other day when I talked about the incident with my bestie)
   
      Feelings  mixed up, I can't laugh or cry or smile or even get moody....  was paralyzed the whole day .. I couldn't describe..
   
       And then I search for some psychological advice from the internet and the best advice was letting my close friend know to solve this with me .
 
        Sounds pretty stupid but yeahh >< ..
So,was going to give up.. Coz he's going to sit for an incredibly important exam this year. Doesn't want to distract him..but then that one particular day which strikes back got me so badly influenced by my emotions again!!!!
     
       Was going to find my biology teacher in the office coz she'd forgotten us in the laboratory....She's preparing stuffs for teachers day if not mistaken..THEN I SAW HIM SITTING THERE IN THE OFFICE !(taking arts exam? ) and that moment with my bunch of karayzeeee friends...they teased me..at first I tot boy A was kidding , but then he was a friend of my crush ... So Boy A  went to say hi to my crush ,, and I TOTALLY FORGOTTEN THAT my friend there is sort of a fearless type ==... He told my crush that I was looking for him(I didnt!!) , then my crush walked out of the room ...and towards me .. Asking : are you looking for me? And I ran away..(walked rapidly) just like that...... TT like im insane :|